If you somehow can make a full engaging moment, where you easily talk about everything unimportant that has everything to do with you. Like the top 5 movies, top 5 music, top 5 things to do on Sunday morning, mine is 1. sleep 2. Sleep 3. SleEp 4. sLeeP and 5. SleEp. I'm waiting for that moment to come.
I wish I was simple. 2 and 2 is never just 4 with me. I remember when I was still in school, Math is supposed to be exact science, right? but, I was questioning all the equations, ignoring the fact that a building could not be build without the exact measurements. But, in real life human relationship, you can only throw hypothesis formula of human interaction.
There's a large stack of self improvement book, all pretentious with its pop psychology formula. I could never get through reading them. I like to take those psychology test that kind of reveals your some what personality buy comparing your deep needs of attention with the kind of holiday you would rather have. Beach, Mountain, etc. You know. Are your glass half full or half empty? But books like 8 Effective ways to be a better person, or 24 steps to be a good leader, 5 easy steps to be popular, it could never hold my attention long enough. By the time it starts to tell me what I am supposed to do in a certain situation, I just drop it. Because I have a lousy will power? no strong motives to change for the better? A smart ass refusing a good advise?
Most of the things that has deep impact in my character growth came from anywhere but self improvement books. Which can be quite a contradiction because I do like taking those pop psychology test, kokology, test that determines if you are sanguine or melancholy.
I just think that whatever my problem might be, It won't be solved easily by flipping the pages until I find the specific chapter that tells the easy solution. Okay, so people have a pattern in their characters and how they behave,you group them in psychology terms like the music industries labeled different kind of music, so you could easily find away to deal with different stereotypes of people. But, We are talking about people here.
Most of the lessons I had, didn't came from a self improvement books. It came from the real world, real people, some of it came from art that imitates life, art that tells the story of humans life, the literature, the movies, the music. I remember the lines in Nick Hornsby's High Fidelity " What came first, the music or misery? Did I listen to music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to music? Do all those records turn you into a melancholy person? People worried about kids playing guns, and teenagers watching violent videos, we are scared that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands-literally thousands- of songs about broken hearts and rejection and pain and misery and loss. But I do know that they've been listening to the sad songs longer than they've been living the unhappy lives"
